We all value our independence. As individuals, we want the freedom to make our decisions and choices in life. This need is deep and natural because in essence, we are free spirited, and anything restricting our freedom is resisted. We don’t like others deciding for us all the time. Maybe we may have made the same decision, and we know they have our best interest at heart. Knowing we have our space and freedom is important.

But being independent does not mean we don’t need others. Nor should it take the colour of us being so individualistic and self-centred that it borders on us living as an island. Independence when not understood, can, in fact, make us prisoners of our own ego.

We truly grow when we move from being independent to being interdependent. The paradigm of collaborating and building strong mutual relationships can make life ever so meaningful.

Interdependence is not using others as a crutch, leaning on them all the time. That’s just dependence. Interdependence is playing an equal role in their life as well when needed.

Many of us may have worked hard to gain our independence in the relationships we carry. Large families, dominating partners, or being a minor voice may have sometimes stifled us. But let our journey of becoming independent not harden us.

We can only move from independence to interdependence when we cultivate humility and love.

The humility to accept that no matter how talented and resourceful we may be, the role of others in our life is vital. We have much to learn from them, and their intervention at critical points in our life could well have been turning points.

The love to be ever sensitive and caring in reaching out to others in their time of need. Our willingness and ability to make ourselves available to others does not hamper our progress. It helps us grow, not just the relationship, but our inner capacity to love.

When we drop our ego and truly understand and live with interdependence, we will realise the beauty of the statement – I am because you are.

(Picture-Chikoo tree in our garden)