We often wonder how much the opinion of others should matter in the way we live our lives.  Living by the expectations of others can put immense pressure on us and make us do things not natural to us, or things we are not comfortable with. On the other hand, just living the way we want to, regardless of others around us can have its own repercussion on our relationships. Torn between the two choices, we are often not very clear which one to choose. On reflecting, we will realise that it is neither in absolute; the answer lies somewhere in the middle.

Sometimes the opinion of others draws our attention to areas we may have missed out on. Sometimes our behaviour may need correction, something we may not be able to see for ourselves. People who care for us give us their opinion, keeping our best interest in mind.

We carry a lot of experience and knowledge in our field, and yet we regularly need an external perspective to help us find the best way forward. Opinions of others can shine a light on options we may not have considered.

Sometimes we find opinions bordering on criticism and being judgemental. It may well be the case. However, even in sharp criticism, we may be able to find one piece of truth which can make a difference to us. Opinions often have hidden messages for us.

And yet there are times we need to guard ourselves from getting swayed and pressured by the opinions of others.

Sometimes others around us may not understand our choices because they may not carry the same convictions and preferences as we do. Even if we are in the minority, we must stand by what we believe, even when popular opinion is against us.

There are times we try too hard to fit in, seeking the approval of others. It is true we are all part of a larger social setup, and the opinion of others can put subtle pressure on us. But when we find the inner courage to live true to who we are, and our security comes from our integrity rather than the approval of others, interestingly we will find that the pressure changes to respect.

We will know that we can handle opinions well when we develop the humility to accept a point better than our own, and also develop the centredness to live by our own truth. And we will do well to remember a simple fact of life – the opinion of others can help us in our journey of life, but our sense of self-worth comes from our courage and authenticity, not from the opinion of others.

(Picture – Town Hall in Basel, Switzerland)