We constantly strive for a better quality life, and this seems like it is always work in progress. It is true because as the world around us changes, we need to keep changing to be able to adapt and respond adequately. Herein sometimes lies our struggle; we make our plans and lists, and yet find that instead of making progress, we are often going around in circles with half-fulfilled commitments. The answer may well lie in the simple yet powerful lens through which we need to review and plan – start, stop, continue.

There are things we need to start doing. A changed situation and new opportunities may need us to start doing things that till recently may not have been necessary. We may also find several strained relationships that need to be normalised for which we need to start making an effort. Even though we may be clear on what we need to start doing, our success lies in overcoming our inertia, fear and sometimes ego in taking the first step.

But change does not only come with what we need to start doing, it is equally important to be clear on what we need to stop doing. What was relevant and meant for us to handle until yesterday, may not be ideal for us to carry on; or a behaviour and habit, that we are living with, may well need a serious relook and change. We will only be successful when we learn to delegate, get out of our comfort zones which often gives us a false sense of achievement and happiness, and when we find the inner conviction to stop something which deep down we know we need to.

Not everything needs to change all the time. There are things we need to continue doing, in fact, if we keep changing too many things too often, it confuses not only people around us but us as well. When we recognise that there are routines that keep us focused and disciplined, and areas that we are best suited to take care of, we must not abandon them just for the sake of change. However, we need to be careful as the mind can trick us into getting distracted from our core duties and responsibilities. And we will only be successful when we find the clarity of purpose and emotional stamina to keep us focussed and committed to continue what we should. My school Principal always said – devotion to duty will determine your destiny.

Life will change only when we make the effort to make the changes in ourselves. When we find ourselves struggling to cope, the answer may well lie in sitting in silence and reflecting on the things we need to start doing, stop doing, and continue doing.

(Picture – Church in Cologne )