Each one of us needs space. Even in the closest of relationships, there needs to be the ability to give each other their personal space and freedom. But we need to be careful that giving space to each other does not create a distance. We can protect ourselves from this if we reflect on what it truly means to give and take space in relationships.

When space is given with respect and sensitivity, realising that every individual is different and may have different needs, it strengthens the relationship. But if space is given out of anger, focussing on our differences rather than our needs, then we start creating a distance.

When space is given from a sense of security, knowing that the bonds of a relationship are built on trust, it strengthens the relationship. But when space is grudgingly given and we constantly feel insecure having given the space, then we create a distance.

When space is given from love, it is given keeping the best interest of the other in mind. Just like each tree in a forest needs sunlight, we realise that each person also needs their share of space to grow and flourish. But if space is given and we still continue to be possessive and feel uncomfortable, then we create a distance.

Relationships are like train tracks. They are effective because they move together all along, and yet have space between them to carry the different wheels of the train. Two people are like two wheels in a relationship. The relationship survives and grows because they not only move together but also give space for each one to grow and develop as a person.

When someone in a relationship asks for space, we need to realise that the person is not necessarily moving away. It is an expression of an individual need to help strengthen the collective needs of the relationship. And we will be comfortable in giving and taking space in a relationship when we are secure in ourselves and realise that giving space need not create a distance.

(Picture-Canadian Rockies)