As we look back on life, we may have many regrets. Wrong decisions, missed opportunities, relationships that didn’t work out. It is only when we reflect, that we feel some could have been avoided, while some occurred despite our best efforts.

The vital energy that throbs within all of us is drained by three factors – regrets of the past, excitement of the present and worry of the future. Not only do they rob us of our equanimity and balance, they take away our ability to give our best here and now. With a compromised ability, we make mistakes. And today’s mistake becomes tomorrow’s regret.

To overcome our regrets we need to understand our regrets.

A regret is an emotion attached to an event that has already happened. The event is dead, gone, it no longer exists but we continue to hold on to the emotions associated with it. Most times, these are emotions of sorrow, guilt, anger or despair. Carrying this load in our hearts, is like tying a weight to a runner’s legs and expecting him to perform his best. Regrets are the invisible weight we carry, while the world only sees us smile.

On deeper reflection, we realise that not all regrets are based on our mistakes. Some things are just not meant to be.

Does this mean we should drop the thought of what happened and move on? We need to drop the regret, but learn from the experience.

When we replace regret with reflection, find the ability to reconcile with circumstances and move forward with renewed understanding and conviction, we release immense internal energy. And when we redirect this force and channelise it correctly, not only have we risen above our regrets, we have used our regrets to reshape us.

There is much we can and must do in life, for which we have limited time. Each day is special and allows us to build a better life for ourselves and others. Let us not look back at our life and regret the fact that we did not let go of our regrets.