It is one thing accepting where we have erred, having done and said things we probably should not have, but our true growth lies in developing the ability to make amends. Making amends goes beyond taking responsibility; it is relooking, rediscovering, and rededicating ourselves to make the changes we need to make in our life. But we will truly be able to make amends if we remove the obstacles that hold us back, in spite of knowing what we need to do.
We need to remove the obstacle of ego. Our ego tricks us into justifying our actions rather than being honest with ourselves and accepting the fact that we were at fault. We can start making amends when we start seeing ourselves clearly for what we truly are.
We need to remove the obstacle of hurt. Even when we have been at fault, chances are we too may have been wronged. Sometimes we focus on our own hurt so much, we forget that we need to make amends to someone who may be hurting. We can start making amends when we move from hurting to learning how to heal.
We need to remove the obstacle of guilt. It is good to take responsibility, but sometimes we can be very hard on ourselves, feeling the guilt and pressure of having made bad choices. What we don’t realise is that the burden of guilt blocks the free flow of our energy and creativity. We can make amends when we start believing in our ability to come out stronger and we learn to give ourselves a second chance.
We need to remove the obstacle of selfishness. We don’t realise it, but sometimes life becomes all about what we want to do and the way we want things to be. Even as we think we are living life on our terms, we often overlook the fact that we may be insensitive to those dependent on us and those who love us. We can make amends when we learn to nourish the relationship rather than only feeding our individuality.
We need to remove the obstacle of self-image. Often we hesitate and feel awkward in apologising because we feel we will become smaller in someone else’s eyes, and sometimes we just don’t know how to. We can make amends when we develop the courage to say sorry when we need to, learning to do what is right rather than worrying about how we will look.
When we don’t mend things in time, we risk losing them forever. It is the same with life. Deep in our hearts when we know that something is not right, we need to remove all the obstacles and set things right. And we will soon realise that we can only make a wonderful future for ourselves when we learn to make amends, starting today.
(Picture-The beautiful city of Paris)
Dear Vivek,
While the posts continue to cajole and remind of various aspects of life, Your discipline and regularity is extremely inspiring 🙏