Words can get us into trouble. Often the effect is different from what we meant and sometimes has long term implications.
We usually say things based on our state of mind and from our point of view. But that’s not always the best way of looking at things before saying something.
I learnt the hard way when I once met a customer at the airport and during our conversation I touched upon his overdue payments. I didn’t realise a friend of his was with him and within earshot. Ever since we’ve lost the customer. What I said was not wrong, but the choice of time and place was incorrect. I had been insensitive to the situation and hurt his ego.
And on reflecting I realised that we need to always be mindful of three things before we speak.
The place (sthaan), the timing (samay) and the situation (stithi). And when we are mindful of this, the same words land very differently.
These rules will come naturally to us when we operate from care for the other. We will intuitively know what to say, when to say and in what situation to say it.
Being mindful, caring and other oriented doesn’t make us soft and weak. On the contrary, it helps build strong lasting relationships and create powerful impact.
Words are like fire. It can warm someone’s heart or burn bridges. And if we’re caring and mindful of the time, place and situation we will experience and unleash the true power of our Words.
Yes, very true and it becomes more difficult for the person who speaks from heart.
Thanks for this reminder. You have pretty much defined empathy here. The ability to put yourself in someone else’s shoes. It’s essential but so difficult if you don’t have the training for it.
True. And when we train ourselves to take a pause before saying something, we develop the alertness and empathy you speak of.