We live with hundreds of Desires. We are born with strong inherent tendencies which are like seeds. They germinate in the form of desires and give rise to thoughts. And when these thoughts get stronger, we are propelled into action. Our actions in the world, therefore, are nothing but our desires in motion.
We are constantly engaged in living out our desires. As we satisfy one, we have the next waiting for our attention. If we think about it, at the root of fulfilling our desires is the need to be happy. And we do get happiness but soon start feeling the discontent, prompting us into fulfilling the next desire and the next and the next. This becomes the never-ending cycle of our life. And desires can become a bondage.
Our happiness quotient gets defined by the number of desires lived out divided by total desires. But both numerator and denominator are increasing making this an equation difficult to manage.
The answer lies in understanding some fundamental truths. Desires fulfilled, can give us temporary happiness, not permanent joy. And sometimes, the more we indulge, the stronger the desire gets. And if we have pegged our happiness to fulfilling desires, we may feel we have overcome one, but in reality we have just replaced one desire with another.
Generally, our desires direct our attention outward in the world. Our mental preoccupation with satisfying them denies us the opportunity and mind space to discover our inner world, where permanent Joy resides.
When we start reflecting on the temporary nature of things and decide that if it is Joy we seek, then even as we live out the desires which have germinated and propelled us into action, we are aware of the Joy within. Desires become a means to give us a direction in life, not an end in themselves. And soon we find the desire to turn inwards growing in us.
And when the flow is not about wanting, but giving, living our desires doesn’t become a bondage. Lived correctly, they liberate us.
We then don’t live “for” joy, but “with” Joy.
Yes Vivek you are spot on, we seek our desires in the outer world because we get instant gratification but the downside is that the law of diminishing returns kicks in and we indulge more and more to get the same hapiness quotient as we experienced the first time around and so get into this vicious never ending cycle of wanting more. Seeking inner peace and joy is definitely the answer but to some of us it just an idea and not yet a conviction that this is the only way to reach the goal of permanent hapiness , so we must progress, like you said to start with being aware of our thoughts as soon as they arise and take corrective action to redirect them inward.
I have a question, is it the desire that germinates into a thought or is it the thought of a previous sense gratification which creates a fresh desire ? If it’s the latter then being aware of our thoughts at all times should work, easier said then done though.
Desires operate through 3 channels.
1. Our inherent tendencies appear as Desires in the Intellect, as explained by Vivek, when the outer situation is conducive for its fulfilment.
2. Temptations from the outer world. Eg. When we see our friends enjoying we get tempted.
3. Through memories. We remember earlier sense gratifications and want to repeat them now.
Well said. Desires and expectations are the key causes of all suffering.
Thank you Vivek.
Enjoying this sharing platform.
If there are no desires, then what’s the true purpose of living?
Is it being selfish & finding permanent joy only for own self?
Interesting question Prakash. Desires give us our Goals “in” life. But our Goal “of” life is to dis-cover our true Divinity. The way we act while living out our desires leads to our inner growth and development. To want to discover our true nature is not selfish at all. The problem is not the desire, but how we engage with it that maters. Desires will come to us, because the tendencies exist. But if we keep chasing and fuelling them,the never-ending cycle continues.
As a start if we can first refine our desires and not give into every temptation, then reduce them, the inner clarity will start.
Vivek
Excellent thought. My question is – my karma has to have a desire / a defined end for me to be satisfied in any time frame and relax. I pursue my daily goals to achieve my final goal, but I have to have a desire to pursue anything and to enjoy the journey.
Sandeep you are absolutely right, our mind needs a goal to work towards. The mind cannot work in a vacuum. The goal has to be inspiring and natural to what we want to achieve. Viewed thus,the desire is the propelling force activating us to reach our goal.
Herein lies the test. If we treat the fulfillment of the desire as an end in itself, we will be filled with anxiety for its achievement and on achieving it,the feeling of enjoyment will linger on for long after the action is over, further deepening the desire for wanting more.
But,if we recognise that the desire was like a catapult to throw us into action, then we focus on how we traverse the journey. If the karma is done in a spirit of dedication to the higher for the benefit of all, without a sense of ego, then even though desire-prompted, the action doesn’t bind us. and over a period of time when we act and live with this spirit, we exhaust our desires and with reflection sublimate some of them, preparing us for the achieving our Goal of Life.
I think a desire does not come from the thought of a previous sense gratification. It comes from the experience of a previous sense gratification. Every experience has a seen and an unseen result. The unseen result is what creates a notch in our memory and leads to an innate tendency of repeating that act – Vasana. Hence, if we are mindful and aware of our internal reaction to every experience, especially those which make us extremely happy or extremely sad, we will be able to experience and move on, without developing an innate tendency to repeat or abhor that act. The desire > thoughts > actions chain is a result of the vasanas created.
I agree with Vinitaji, that vasanas are also acquired from external temptations. But somewhere I feel that one is tempted by any external stimulus, based on his past experience of the possible outcome falling in his box of likes and not dislikes. These boxes are a result of past experiences. Hence external temptations seem appealing based on our past experiences.
What we ideally need to do is prevent the vasanas from being created. The objective is to either sublimate the vasanas or exhaust them, but in a way that we don’t create stronger vasanas in the process.
It is okay to have a Rasgulla in the moment, enjoy it for the moment and then letting it go instead of soaking that relishing experience into your soul which will lead to you craving for having one again and again and again.
By offering or serving a higher ideal, we gradually stop feeding our ego. When the importance of “i” reduces, the innate tendency to feed the ego also gradually reduces. Besides, introspection, bhakti, karma yoga, etc will all help walk the path…. easier said than done though
Thanks for this enlightening perspective Ajay !
I loved your last lines “when desire becomes less of wanting and more of giving “
Beautiful !